Are you in need of a laugh this morning? Good, because I’m here to embarrass myself. Today is day 4 of my new job, but on day 2, 2 things happened that were just so lovely.
First off, I think that my oatmeal skills are off, because remember when I exploded my oatmeal at home last week? Well it was my first time using the microwave at work and my oatmeal exploded in the microwave. Carrying a napkin full of oatmeal around the kitchen is a great first impression for those that you’ve never met before.
Secondly, when I was heading home for lunch, I swiped my fob leaving, and apparently I wasn’t supposed to, because it set the alarm off in the entire building. I wasn’t there for it, but I guess when the next person opened the door, it went off. And I’m not talking fire alarm, I’m talking security alarm. In my opinion, I don’t think they should have a fob “panel” thing that says “Alarm On” at the door if you’re not supposed to swipe it! That was an even better way to make a first impression. Welp.
My advice column is now finished and back to non-embarrassing talk. Well, this might be embarrassing too, but I like to think of it as “freakishly cool.”
My friends Nichole & Delinda (former coworkers) were talking last week about those seaweed wraps from It Works Wraps that miraculously shrink you in one use. We were all intrigued, and I thought the talk of it had died down until Delinda got Nichole’s friend, who is a rep for the wrap, to host a party. I got so excited, and after seeing the before and after pictures, I immediately texted Nichole and wanted to see if her friend had any hanging around I could try out. She did, and for $25, I tried it out Tuesday night. I figured for that price, I could see what the fuss was about and not worry about losing out on money if it didn’t work.
sort of have to rock a bikini during my 4th of July vacation at Cape Cod in front of friend from Philly, so I wanted to speed up this “get a 6-pack” quest a bit.
So last night, after running to Target to purchase saran wrap and other organizational supplies, I took a shower to quickly open up my pores (recommended for best results).
Then I placed it around the front of my abdomen, and then saran wrapped the shit out of my stomach. I felt like the kid from The Christmas Story, because even bending over was difficult, and every time I walked from room to room, I squeaked… so I resorted to laying on my bed and blogging while waiting for the 45 minutes to go by.
I took it off, and felt and looked bloated, which was a possible effect for some people, but it just meant that their body took to it the best and will see the best results (better be true).
There was remaining lotion on the pad, so I rubbed it over my arms (go away jiggle), and then let it seep in.
I forgot to say (and I’m too lazy to insert this in the correct spot above), but I had to measure my stomach at my belly button, and 2 inches above and below it prior to wrapping up. Well. Guys. Yesterday morning I measured myself and I lost 1 inch at all locations. Whaddddup with that?!
Last night after work Linds and I hit up Bikram Yoga for a little sweat sesh. We almost didn’t make it on time because I got out of a work meeting late, but we were able to grab the last 2 spots in the back.
Within 5 minutes of the class starting, I was drenched. Some people barely dropped a bead of sweat. If you don’t sweat, you are a freak.
I’m also surprised I didn’t get kicked out of class for laughing with Lindsay while we were waiting for it to start. I am a little kid and find things like stretching in a heated room hilarious. I also felt extremely drunk after class, and was laughing my sweaty face off the entire car ride home.
For those unlucky friends on Snap Chat, they received my unimpressed post yoga face.
I’m a peach.
And to randomly throw this in here. I had protein waffle sticks with peanut buttah smeared on them. Heavenly.
Have you ever tried Bikram Yoga? Do you sweat like a mofo?